From the Mouth of the Max (i.e. Maxisms)

Here are few funny things Max has said recently:

I brought him home teaching with me the other day. My companion is originally from the Philippines and has an accent. While he was teaching our family Max looks at me:

Max: "What language is he speaking?"
Dad: "English."
Max: "Do you speak English?"
Dad: "Yes, and so do you."

Later, I was teaching him how to say You are beautiful in German. (Du bist schoen)

Max: Does mommy know how to say that?
Dad: I'm not sure, I think I've taught her that. I sure think she's beautiful don't you?
Max: Yeah she is, but her tummy is getting too big.

He was sitting on the toilet the other day:

Max (in a strained voice): My [boy part] hurts!
Dad: Why?
Max (still in a strained voice): I don't know.
Max (no longer strained): It's teeny tiny.

Today after church:

Max: Dad these are the things we can play: pirates, marbles, games...
Mom (interrupting): And give mom a kiss!
Max: No mom! I'm spending time with Daddy right now!!

Dat hav Cow Meok?

For years now people have been quoting (i.e. Mocking) my adorable now 5 year old asking if a food or drink has any dairy content. Well, Lisa and Beth (two of my sisters who like to mock him), he now need not ask that question.

Yesterday he had another allergy test (still pending some lab blood tests) (did I ever tell you that I used to be a phlebotomist for two weeks!) and is now only allergic to those nasty cats and nasty dusts. His allergy to cow milk and associated derivatives, beef, dogs, and beef dogs did not register on this test! It is very nice to know that our limited food products have become more liberated (not that he'll eating anything aside from corn dogs and dino nuggets!).

Naturally, being such kind parents that we are, we aren't going to tell him about the disappearance of the dog allergy, as we do not want to be bombarded by "Can we get a dog, pwease??" questions. Cruel? Maybe, but can you blame me? We might let him know he can have cow milk things, but we're still undecided.

P.S. He will be getting tubes placed in his ears for the third time on Monday.

Chutes and Ladders

After nap time this evening Max, Sam and I played a barrage of games: Candy Land (Max's favorite), followed by a few rounds of HI HO! Cherry-O, a couple tries at Chutes and Ladders, and finally Sam's favorite: Cranium Cariboo.



It was after Sam and I won the the first round of Chutes and Ladders by taking first place in the dog show, ("Best in Show" if you will,) and part way up the longest ladder having successfully helped a cat down from a tree, that I saw a problem with this game. Sure it teaches children the a valuable lesson in the consequences of our actions, the exercise of our free agency, as well as the rewards from good choices. (I think Max actually thought I was mad at him when I exclaimed "Uh oh, you colored on the wall again!!", but then I smiled and then he smiled.) But have you ever really considered what values are being imparted by the examples in this game?



Case in point:

Let's begin with the biggest Ladder. You can move from square #28 to #84 by doing something as stupid as climbing a tree (without a ladder) to help some cat that was dumb enough to climb the same tree. Why, I ask, is it such a great thing to climb trees? I'm sure the kid's mother told him not to climb it!? Why move forward 56 squares for this and only 10 for baking a nice cake, or only 16 for cleaning the house?


Soon Max will think he can either spend all of his Saturday mowing the lawn (22 squares), baking (again 10 squares), actually eating his healthy food (a measly 8), and finding mom's purse (20); or just go outside and climb the forbidden tree to get the neighbors cat, to which he is allergic. I mean really, what would have happened had he fallen out of the tree?
Answer: If we look at the trend of the chutes: he may become hypothermic (I hope they revive Meredith Grey) from falling through thin ice (-22), break a window with a baseball (-20), or graffiti something (-20).

Following these pattern's I'm sure he'll only lose about 5 squares or so. It's not a bad gamble then to try to save the @#%! cat, and have all of Saturday left to slide down all of the other chutes without losing much ground.

Or you could spend all your time with said cat and win the pet show and simultaneously win the whole freakin' game!

Basically, the trend that I have come to recognize in this game is "Help control the pet population; have your pet spayed or neutered." I guess if you are nice to animals you'll do well in life, even without a high school diploma. Don't worry about homework, hard work, or kindness to other homosapiens, just focus on cats and dogs (yes, bandaging a rabid dog will get you one space further than if you help the lady recover her stolen satchel).

Well, it is a fun game, but I can't help but wonder if Hasbro is getting a kick back from the Humane Society and/or Bob Barker. At least they give you 38 squares for planting a seed and you could stretch it and liken that one unto faith, but who are they kidding? What are the odds of getting a "one" on your fist spin? (A: 1 in 6)



P.S. I think pulling on a cats tail should be a ladder rather than a chute!

Finally SNOW...well a little at least

Friday morning, while Em was out getting her glucose tested, I got to stay home with the boys for a couple of hours! Luckily when we woke up it had snowed and was snowing!! So, with great excitement we got bundled up and went out and put Max's sled to work. (He's only had limited time to use it since Santa dropped it off).

And of course we finished it all off with a little H.C.

Cat Got Your Tongue?

There are two types of people in this world...those who love dogs and those who don't.

I rarely watch the news, but last night I was watching it while performing a little dental hygiene. I 'm glad I did, watch the news as well as floss, because this following story came on (and I got the plaque out of there). It will either make you cringe and cry or lol:

They say every dog has its day, and one local pooch had one heck of a day. This is truly an amazing story and one that is playing out more often around the country because more and more people have paper shredders at home.
Riley is a 7-month-old mutt who got himself in a real jam this weekend.
Riley's owner Dorothy Itle says, "He was hovering over the shredder and I kept trying to push him away and he stuck his tongue out. I still shudder just thinking about it"
Dorothy rushed Riley to the animal ER in West Toledo. "I knew it had to be serious the way he yelped. All I could think of is that I have to get him to the hospital as quickly as possible."
Animal Emergency and Critical Care Dr. Kittsen McCumber says, "The shredder makes noise, the dog goes to check it out, he sniffs it and licks it, and his tongue starts feeding through the shredder."
Riley underwent a complex surgery. Amazingly Riley was eating and drinking just eight hours after surgery.

I have to admit that my response was a loud guffaw and continued laughter. I slightly apologize to any who may be offended, but it was funny.

My Answer to EM

I know you can read my thoughts, boy: Meow, Meow, Meow, Meow, Meow, Meow, Meow, Meow, Meow, Meow, Meow, Meow, Meow, Meow, Meow, Meow. --Homer Simpson

No More Binky!!!!

Here is one of the reasons why we have finally gotten rid of Sammy's pacifier: anterior openbite. I've conceded the fact that you can't be a pediatric dentist if your own son has a binky all the time and can't bite a chip with his front teeth! We'll have to see how long it takes to get those front teeth together.

Chocolate Fondue and a Cream Puff

NOTHING SAYS "HAPPY NEW YEAR" LIKE FONDUE!!!!

"Perfect Day"

I was able to get home early enough today to take Max to see a matinee. When I called home before leaving work, mom said that he earned it because as she was laying with Sam at nap time, Max left the room and cleared out the whole dishwasher! He has been saying lately that he wants to go to the movie theater and since he now is being influenced by TV advertising (he wants Healies and the rocket fishing rod), he really wanted to see "Charlotte's Web."* We left mom and Sam asleep at home and set off in my car (Max was given the choice of what car to take and he said "yours, it's much better." (Yes the 1989 Honda recently named "Puff" is much better. After all who doesn't want a plume of smoke following you around town and your teeth chattering at stop signs as the car is about to shake itself apart?)
He thoroughly enjoyed the movie and seemed to have followed it quite well. He kept saying on the way there, during the movie, and on the way home: "This is the perfect day!"** (I have to emphasize here just how completely joyful and happy he was each time he said this...He was even more excited then on Christmas)

Following the movie we went to Wendy's for dinner where to our surprise the kids meals came with Charlotte's Web toys!! (How perfect!)

After having a fun outing with Dad, Max was so giddy to go home and see mommy and Sammers. He really was soo excited to see Sammy and when we got home Sammy was extremely glad to see his brother. They both had missed each other so much. It was so cute.

(Unfortunately the night was then interrupted by my pager and me rushing off to the emergency room to take care of a trauma patient. )

It really was the "perfect day." I think he went the whole day without having a timeout or being yelled at. He was super duper good today!!
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*The movie was very very good! Well done, funny and had a lot of famous voices in it.

**Other great quotes include: "I didn't even miss you today because I only had to wait 5 minutes and you were home" (comment on me coming home early).

"Treating patients is boring. You don't get to be home with your family. Boring! Boring! Boring!

"You're the biggest and mommy is the smartest."

Christmas By The Bay-Tribute to SF

We were spending a leisurely morning listening to Christmas's music when the song "Christmas By The Bay" by Tim Hockenberry came on. We love this song and every time we've heard it this year it makes us want to cry. We had a great Christmas staying in San Francisco last year and we totally fell in love with SF over the past 4 years. (Not to take away anything from our Little Rhody, we are becoming quite fond of her too!) Here are a few of our favorite memories from last Christmas. SF may not be as glamorous as New York in so far as the decorating granduer but we certainly Left Our Heart In San Francisco!

UNION SQUARE

OAKLAND TEMPLE

CRAZY MAN AT UNION SQUARE

STREET ORNAMENTS

UNION SQUARE

HYATT HOTEL LOBBY

Father and Son

Some claim we look alike?

It's Christmas Time in The City

First Day of Snow!!!

As I began my trek downstairs to get ready in the morning yesterday, my breath was taken away as I saw huge snowflakes drifting down outside the window. Shortly thereafter Max woke up and I hurried him over to the window. He quickly went downstairs to look at it out the door. He has eagerly awaited the time that it would snow. The fact that he was only wearing underwear and a shirt detered him not from going out and getting handfuls to eat. About forty minutes later as I lay on the floor in the office excercing/strecthing his cute little face appeared at the door: "Hi Daddy!" "Hi sweetheart!" Then all of a sudden I get hit in the leg by a large wet snowball and he goes giggling away to get more. It was very cute and I was able to persuad him from getting more inside the house. We then went upstairs for breakfast and I showed him all the snow on the trampline and he went out and jumped without pants socks or shoes! It was reather cute! Once Sammer woke up they both got bundled up and we went out to play for a few minutes before I had to leave for work (even a few minutes longer than that). They really loved it and it looked so beautiful out with everything covered with a white coating! It was especially fun to see the beaming excitement and wonder in Max's face.

Christmas in the Air and Leaves on the Ground

The morning began with the Christmas Brunch at the local ward house. It was great, I highly recommend this form of celebration over the dinner party. Yummy eggs, sausage, bacon, muffins, not so yummy cheese grits, and even a chocolate fondue fountain.
Note: wait until after breakfast is over to bring Santa in. Then, after a failed attempt (due to icy wind gales) to get a suitable Christmas photo (Cards may be late this year, sorry), we headed to our first festival of trees.

There were lots of beautiful trees and luckily for all, a free carousel, train/golf cart ride, and craft activities. And luckily for Em vendor booths. Bam really enjoyed watching all the little dance numbers; his cousins would be pleased.
These were the two trees I liked best:

a Christmas palm tree, and the "Rudolph and Friends" tree. There was also a wicked awesome gingerbread reproduction of the "Providence Performing Arts Center." It was amazing. I liked the chocolate bar doors!

cute faces/profiles
(Bam's was immediately transferred to Em's arm and Max's to his collar a little later.)

The rest of the afternoon was spent raking leaves into the night. Our street has a micro climate and just finished having all the leaves drop and there sure were a lot of leaves.

Happy Thanksgiving Pilgram!

Our Thanksgiving began aboard the Mayflower II, a seaworthy reproduction in Plymouth Massachusetts. Not as grand or exciting as Mr. Bates made it seem, but still cool to behold!





The view of the Atlantic Ocean from the Plimouth Palisade.A kind Pilgrim taught this little one how to strike a wedge with an English accent.The same little boy was denied his request to stoke the fire.

On Thursday, Em provided us with a beautiful table and a scrumptious meal. It was our first official D&E Family Thanksgiving!!! We successfully navigated the difficulties of only having one oven to cook the various dishes, and enjoyed a great meal. E shined in her pinnacle of domesticity.

MOST GRACIOUS ADORABLE ONE

While sitting in my den/home office/study this morning at about 5:30 am or so I began hearing some scampering upstairs. Expecting to hear one of the boys beginning to scream, I prepared myself for ignoring them until they either woke the other one up of went back to sleep.

Then I heard the scampering enter the bathroom and then the kitchen. Expecting to hear the MOST GRACIOUS ADORABLE ONE begin barfing, I prepared myself for ignoring, I mean prepared myself to go upstairs and help her. As no violent heaving noises were heard I figured she simply need a bowl of cereal to calm her stomach. Then the scamperer descended the squeaky stairs. Next, my beautiful wife entered with a cup of milk and a plate with two pieces of

melted cheese and a bowl of applesauce for my breakfast!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

She woke up before the sun even thought to and made me a yummy, fortifying and much needed breakfast. I had just been dreading having to come up with something to eat and contemplating stopping at the Dunk (Dunkin' Donuts) on the way to the OR. What a wicked awesome wife I have!!!!!

Movie Night, A Zoo, and a Creamery

The weekend began with a fun movie night with M and the boys, Curious George, and individual popcorns. It was a wicked fun. George is a great movie and M hadn't seen it yet. The boys cuddled with us the whole time...wicked cute. Max giggled the whole time and Sam watched intently and was sad when George was captured.
This was the view out our window (across the street) yesterday morning. Most of New England's leaves are on the ground, yet our street is just starting to fall. It is wicked pretty.
I finally got us to all get out of the house and enjoy the beautiful day. So we went to the Providence Zoo. Its a pretty good zoo, not quite as grand as SF and definitely doesn't compare to San Diego's, but still an enjoyable stroll.

Max's best friend from Pre-K was there too and they went around together the whole time. They are both wicked hyper and ran around the whole zoo together.
This bird kept trying to eat my son's finger.
Creepy stranger.
We stopped at a garage sale, which was over, on the way home and picked through the leftovers on the street. So the boys had to ride home with their heads tucked under a plastic pool. Can't beat a free garage sale. Sam wasn't too happy under their!

Then we had to satisfy the cravings of a pregnant woman who wanted a "real hamburger". So we found a Newport Creamery and got some wicked yummy grub!